I've been soooooo convicted lately about all my stuff. Even as a missionary I live in such excess. It's embarrassing really. A couple of months ago, I was sitting on my bed staring at the storage containers above my closet. Fat clothes. Skinny clothes (that I've yet to fit into!). Cold weather clothes. Nice but not worn clothes. The containers stared back at me and my heart felt heavy like led weights were attached to it. I thought about how I've been blessed by so many different people at different times with different gifts - something tangible or something uplifting like an encouraging word. I cried out to the Lord how I REALLY want to be a blessing like that for others. He said, "Start unpacking, girl."
You see, I'm a recovering pack rat, and being here in the D.R. does funny things to you sometimes. You can't just run out and get something that you need, necessarily, so I have found myself holding onto items for that reason. And, in general, it is easy for me to encourage other people because that's how He knit me together. But the "let go of" bit, that's a little more challenging and that's what He asked of me. And in this case, we're only just talking about replaceable items, and if it's that hard for me with a pair of shoes, how much harder is it to let go of a wrong done, or a deep hurt, or an old pattern?
Anyways, in the last few months, I have made multiple trips dropping stuff off for other people, and do you know what the funny part is: I have been the one that has been totally blessed and the whole point (from my angle) when God and I had our convo was that He would show me opportunities to bless others in whatever way I could. However, it's not about me, it's about Him, AND He's right. It is better to give than to receive.
The photo above strikes me as a reminder that I can't take anything with me when I go to my ultimate home, so why do I feel the need to hang onto stuff here? My heart feels lighter now and there is much freedom in obedience.
When we first moved to the DR we had carefully selected the items that we couldn't live without, things we HAD to bring with us. A few weeks into our time here our house flooded. Because we still had almost no furniture much of our stuff was wrecked. I cried out to God "I gave up almost everything to come here when you said we should, WHY do this!?!?" He said, "I don't want almost everything, I want it all." That was the tough way He had to teach me the lesson you are sharing. Thanks for your heart on this.
ReplyDeleteObedience has a way of lightening our load!
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